Parenting is hectic, and if you’re a mom I will bet your mornings sometimes, or often, go something like this:
- Set alarm to wake up before the kids so you can get your meditation, yoga, workout, journaling, shower in. REALITY: hit snooze, because let’s face it you’ve only been asleep for 2 1/2 hours since you were up with the kid’s nightmares, feedings, tummy aches all night. So you wake up when your 3-year-old is yelling from the kitchen “Mommy I’m cooking the eggs”. (Yes this really happened to me, he put them in the microwave shells and everything. Don’t even ask how he got onto the cabinet to get to the microwave.)
- Calmly Get your children cleaned up, dressed and to the kitchen for the gourmet breakfast where you will all be sharing as a family. REALITY: Your toddler is screaming and will not brush their hair, your 10-year-old is wearing clothes she decided to cut way too short and is yelling at you to quit being the boss of her clothing choices, you finally manage to get them to the kitchen where you all grab granola bars as you run out the door.
- Put the children in the car as you are all singing your favorite family tune. REALITY: Your toddler won’t leave the kitchen and has decided to stage a coo and not go to preschool today, your 10-year-old is in the car, headphones on, honking the horn at you to hurry up. You grab your purse and pry your toddlers vice grip off the kitchen chair and rush to the car, start it and realize you aren’t dressed. You now have to get them out of the car, run to your room, get dressed and then the daunting task of getting them back in the car.
- Drop off your beautiful children calmly with kisses and hugs at their schools. REALITY: Your toddler doesn’t want to go in today and is hitting you as you drag him inside, your 10-year-old realizes he left his homework and decides to have a meltdown in the carpool drop off lane, as “Mary from PTA” is yelling at you to drop-off and move-on.
- Pull into work, fresh, relaxed and ready for a productive day. REALITY: you sit and cry in your car for 5 minutes before you go in, realizing you haven’t even brushed your hair.
Ok, so the above scenario is a bit extreme, but as mom’s, we’ve all been there. For some reason mornings and children AND parents often have a hard time mixing well together. Adults usually want our calm, me time. Kids usually want all attention on them. There are a few tips and tricks to not only smooth out your morning routine but to add rituals to them that teach kids from babies on up how to open themselves up to manifesting productive, abundant, good days for themselves.
Developing and doing morning rituals with your kiddos can be easy and fun and you can teach them at any age, starting as babies!
The first step is to take a look at your own morning manifesting ritual. Do you have one? If you do you can incorporate a bit of your own into what you do with your kids, if not you can develop one right along with the kids! I’m going to break it down by age and stage, with a bit of an intro to what a morning manifesting ritual is.
What is a Morning Manifesting Ritual?
Simply put it’s a way to start the day that sets you on the right course, with the right “tone” to expect a happy, productive, abundant, peaceful, harmonious day. It’s a way to help tell the universe/God/Your higher power (whatever you call it) that you are grateful and ready for good things to come today, to manifest your soul’s desires.
How to teach Morning Manifesting Rituals to your Children:
From the time my son was born until he was a teenager, and no longer appreciated my chipper morning self, I had a ritual I would do with him. It would start with a wake-up song that is a slightly revised version of the song from Singing In The Rain “Good Morning. (my son has always since the womb been a night owl who does not like to wake up before noon). “Good morning, good morning, how are you today? Good morning, good morning, may everything go your way”. Ahh, the curse of being or having a musical-theatre mom, according to my son now. Although he is a grumpy teenager now, he still gets this song sung to him sometimes. He won’t appreciate it until he’s outgrown the “I’m too cool for this shit” stage, but when he’s out “adulting” on his own and hears me singing in his head, he’ll wake up feeling a little better than if I wasn’t.
My point about the often annoying musical wake-up is I would wake him up with a positive vibration. Even if he woke up grumpy, which was 9 times out of 10 for him, he would arise to singing and positivity in his presence.
I then would play the “What I Love Game” with him starting when he was a baby on up through his teens.
*Side-note, he doesn’t like doing this with me now as a teenager, however, I make him do Monday’s with Mom after school every Monday where I sneak it in!
When he was a baby I’d say to him “What do you love today? Do you love mommy? Do you love you? Do you love Simba? (he carried that damn stuffed toy everywhere) Do you love bananas?” He would giggle and smile and laugh and shake his head yes, or no. When I hit something he loved, I would repeat it to him with his name starting it around 3 to 5 times “Foster loves Simba!” Then I would play it with him and turn it on myself “Mommy loves Foster” or “Mommy loves apples” etc.. I would do a couple, however many I felt like. This is a fun way to start breakfast with a baby, they respond to your smile and energy in a delightful way, unless they’re teething and we all know that’s a whole other game!
Then I would play Peek-a-boo with him, which would help him learn how to meditate later on. Baby’s love to mimic and when you inhale deep and slow, then cover your eyes with your hands while you hold your breath and then open your eyes and exhale they see you playing a fun game and will follow what you do. Once you do it a few times, you can tell your baby to do it and help him with it. Make it fun and light and fast!
As he grew I expanded these little rituals I did with him as a baby.
When he was a toddler I would ask him what his “Favorite things this morning were”, then instead of peek-a-boo I turned it into “take a big breath, close your eyes and see how long you can hold it and blow a big bubble to let the air out”, which would always crack him up, especially when I did it with him and make funny faces while inhaling.
When he was in Kindergarten I changed the “what his favorite things” were to “What I’m happy about today”. I always made him do at least 5, but I never stopped him if he wanted to do more. For the breathing, I turned it into the quite game but with breathing. So we would see who could be the quietest while breathing in, holding it for as long as we could and then see who could win the quietest exhale.
When he was in 3rd grade I taught him how to express being thankful, at this age he understood the concept and so we changed his “What I’m happy about today” to “What I’m thankful for”, again I’d make it a game while we were in the kitchen or before he got out of bed (he often lingered in bed if there was no school). Around this time I introduced sitting still and not moving to the breathing game. I have to say honestly this was a tough one for my son. He didn’t love sitting still unless playing video games, but he would have days he would get it and have fun with it. I also would try it with yoga moves, again something my son did not love to do, so I didn’t force him.
When he was in 6th grade I upgraded his morning ritual. At this time, as a preteen, he was beginning his attitude-central stage. Whatever I did, said and told him was wrong, ridiculous and dumb..”No one does this stupid stuff, mom!”. I taught him what being grateful meant and changed his morning ritual to “what he was grateful for”. I’ll be honest, getting a preteen or teenager to tell you what they’re grateful for is like picking apples in an orange grove. They will resist with futility. I did not give up and kept annoying my son every morning. He would sometimes tell me what he was grateful for, and sometimes not. The point is it was a habit being instilled in him, something he had done since a baby. It was also at this time that I taught him how to ask for guidance by being silent. I told him all that silly breathing game stuff was a way to listen to yourself, the universe, your angels, God about what to do. I taught him how he could breathe in counting to 4, close his eyes and hold his breath for 4 counts and then exhale for 4 counts. Then to ask for guidance for the day, with an issue, with people, homework, problems and how that being still and listening to your soul is the only way to find answers. This has taken some time. He gets it now though.
A few years later, around when he was in 8th grade I introduced him to “sending love, good vibes” to people he has problems or issues with, be it a classmate, friend, teacher, me, his dad, whoever. This is a challenging concept to teach a teenager, but showing by your own example is the best practice.
Once he got his drivers license everything changed, our entire morning routine of getting up, eating (or not neither one of us are big breakfast people), driving in the car together to school was no more. Does my now, 18-year-old, do any of this morning ritual? I don’t know. He’s now grown up, it’s his decision. Do I feel good about teaching him these things, you bet. He may not know it now, but he has auto-pilot manifesting ready to go.
As for manifesting, my son has always been able to manifest what he has wanted. He would always win huge prizes at Taco-Tuesdays at Dukes! From the time he was 4 he won expensive jewelry, skateboards, surfboards, money, you name it. He manifested mini “careers” as a pro-skateboarder at the age of 4 (he was sponsored by Zoo York but then decided it was too much pressure and announced his retirement to me at the ripe old age of 4! LOL), he was a drummer and got to play at the house of blues, the Roxy and other big venues in Los Angeles at the age of 9 (then retired from that at the age of 10), he was a professional gamer and won some big bucks at the age of 15, and now he has followed his passion and heart and is becoming a professional writer, which he’s going to college for.
The seeds you plant now, no matter how much you can’t see them, are indeed growing! The things you do consistently with your children when they’re young and as they grow are what will stick with them.
Here’s the breakdown of ages and stages for Morning Manifesting Ritual:
At every age and stage, wake them up with a positive vibe! Whether it’s singing a silly song, repeating a positive mantra or fun saying. Even when they don’t want you too, or you don’t feel like it and ESPECIALLY when they’re cranky!
Baby (6month-2years): Play the “what do you love” game, and peek-a-boo (this 5-10 minute routine with your baby will make a world of difference)
Toddler (2years-5years): Play the “what are your favorite things this morning” game and the hold your breathe and make silly faces game.
Early Childhood (5years-8/9 years): Start the “What are you thankful for” morning routine and the “sitting still while breathing” game. This is a good age to introduce yoga, a few poses in the morning if time and if they’re willing.
Later Childhood (8/9years-12/13years): Change being “thankful” to truly explaining and giving them a good understanding of what “being grateful” is, have them express 5 things they’re grateful for out loud every morning. This is also a great age to transform their breathing and sitting still into the 4X4X4 yoga breath and how to ask their higher-self (God/Universe/Angels whatever your family connects to for higher power) for guidance. This will come in handy for the teen anxiety years, issues, school, friends, etc..
Teen Years (13years-16years): Make sure your teen is still doing the Grateful for 5 things every morning and breathing and asking for guidance. Also, introduce how to send love and good thoughts, vibrations, light to those that your teen is having issues with. This technique can come in handy and help your teenager understand that the world does not, in fact, revolve around her/him and help with getting over feelings of “wrongdoing” by teachers, friends, sports teams, etc..
This morning ritual will be engrained in your child’s life when you do it consistently. It also will help them understand that they are the creators of their world and day and if they set the intention for a good day they are more likely to have one.
The next blog I’ll be giving 2 free digital download 5-minute mom mediations, for morning and night, because let’s be real, when is the last time you were able to get more than 5 minutes alone?
Until then let me know what your morning ritual is or what you will now be incorporating into your morning ritual!